


if we meet again

by bokuakaslovechild



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, AsaNoya - Freeform, Character Death, Death, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Friendship, Love, M/M, Sad, Sad Ending, Unrequited Love, daisuga - Freeform, idk if this is sad but ig it is, it's my first fanfic so don't judge
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-12
Updated: 2021-02-07
Packaged: 2021-03-11 01:48:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,778
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28407267
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bokuakaslovechild/pseuds/bokuakaslovechild
Summary: -------------------------------------------until we meet again, promise me you won't forget me.when we will meet again, remember me.-------------------------------------------sugawara kōshi, azumane asahi and sawamura daichi were friends since their first year in karasuno highschool. they were always together. if you were looking for one of them, you would be sure to find him with the other two, even though they were not in the same class.but, one day, suga lost his self-control. and asahi became somehow the victim.that’s when all started to change between the three boys. and nothing could return back to normal.
Relationships: Azumane Asahi & Sawamura Daichi, Azumane Asahi & Sawamura Daichi & Sugawara Koushi, Azumane Asahi & Sugawara Koushi, Azumane Asahi/Nishinoya Yuu, Minor or Background Relationship(s), Sawamura Daichi & Sugawara Koushi, Sawamura Daichi/Sugawara Koushi
Comments: 4
Kudos: 6





	1. when it all begins

**Author's Note:**

> i don't own any of the characters in the story.  
> i just own the plot.  
> hope you'll enjoy !!
> 
> (btw i'm french so i already apologise for my mistakes because i know my english isn't perfect. so if you see a mistake somewhere, please tell me !)

it was a morning. the dead red leaves were falling to the ground, blown away by the autumn wind. it was cold. but, in this small room of the local hospital, the heat was felt. doctors and nurses rushed and fidgeted. from the outside, one might have thought that this room was very lively, but it was quite the opposite. someone had just left this world.

—————

_10 months ago_

it all started a cold night in january. the second years, sawamura daichi, azumane asahi and sugawara kōshi, were coming home after practice. they knew each other since their first year in karasuno, and rapidly became pretty close friends. they all were in the volleyball club of their highschool.

sugawara kōshi was the oldest of the three. he had slightly thick eyebrows, light grey hair and hazel-brown eyes with a beauty spot under his left eye. he was always smiling, and very supportive towards his teammates or friends.

azumane asahi was the youngest. he had long hair styled as a bun behind his head and dark brown eyes matching his hair as well as his eyebrows. his overall appearance made him look way beyond his age yet slightly unapproachable. unlike what people could think, his character was very different from his appearence. indeed, he was very fearful.

the last one was sawamura daichi. he had short dark hair and dark brown eyes. he was usually seen with a gentle smile on his face, but when he got angry, his eyes glazed over intimidatingly.

like every night after practice, they decided to stop at the shop near the highschool to buy some food. but, this time, something was different. indeed, sugawara suddenly felt weak. he wanted to throw up, but he didn't know why. it was like something had come out of his heart and went up to his throat. but, it wasn't vomit. he was sure it wasn't. it felt like something else, but he couldn't figure out what.

_what was that ? what is that ? what is just happening ? i- i don't understand. i was doing just fine a while ago, so why ?_

he decided not to worry, since nothing had come out, and that he no longer felt that urge to throw up. everything was back to normal. it was certainly nothing serious, he was sure about that. it had happened to him to feel ill and to become again as before a few moments later. yes, it was necessarily that. feeling better, he decided then not to tell to asahi and daichi. he didn't want them to worry about him for nothing.

unfortunately, asahi saw him a while ago when he pit his hand on his heart and the other on his mouth, even though it just lasted 5 seconds at most.

« - are you fine suga ?

\- oh ! yeah ! why ?

\- i just saw you, it was like if... you were feeling bad...

\- oh ! no, no, no ! it was just because of the cold ! we're still in february, so the temperature between the gym and outside is really different !

\- oh, okay... just tell us if you're still cold or something, we'll help you !

\- thanks asahi. »

asahi knew that suga lied to them. he knew suga was the kind of guy to always worry for others but never for himself, the kind to always be there for people but never getting time for him. but, he didn't want to worry him even more, so he did nothing. he let suga believe he wasn't paying attention anymore. and, with that, they all three entered the little shop they had the habit to go every evening.

—————

yelling. that's all they could hear from outside. but they didn't even care about what was happening. they just continued their discussion in the greatest of calm, like if nothing was happening near them.

« - the first setter of kitagawa is on our team ? but the guy's totally cocky.

\- don't try and intimidate him, okay ?

\- i- i wouldn't do something like that. »

suga, daichi and tanaka ryūnosuke, a second year, soon approached the gymnasium. suga was trying to contain tanaka, who, suga was sure, was going to intimidate the first years, even after suga warned him. and he was right. they had barely arrived that tanaka was already making an angry face and yelling at the two boys in front of them. fortunately, daichi stopped him by grabbing his jacket, and started to talk with the boy they were talking about earlier, kageyama tobio.

kageyama's height and impressively sharp glare were his most prominent physical features. his black hair was cropped short, with a fringe that hanged just above his dark blue eyes.

as the third years and tanaka approached him, they noticed he was quite tall, and suga didn't be shy to point it out. kageyama just said he was 1m80, and, just before one of them could react, they were interrupted by another first year, who they totally forgot he was here.

he had unruly, orange hair and brown eyes. his relatively thin build and short stature led him to be mistaken for a junior high student.

« - HELLO !

\- huh ?, questioned tanaka. OH ! you ! shorty #1 ! »

like everyone here, daichi was kind of suprised. but he didn’t manage to make it obvious. instead, he talked to the ginger who was standing between the thre boys and kageyama.

« - so the other applicant here, hinata, is... you ? i’m a little suprised... i see. so both of you are here at karasuno.

\- uhm...

\- we saw your match last year., suga retorted.

\- you’re way short and sucked bad, but you’ve got guts., tanaka tried to compliment.

\- thanks !

\- your jumps were awesome, too. »

this time, it was suga who compliemented the little guy, named hinata shōyō.

« - but you haven’t grown much since. »

of course, tanaka was breaking all the good mood.

he was an interesting guy, really, and suga and daichi liked being around him, but he literally looked and seemed like a bad guy. not only with his posture or his apparence, but also with his ways to talk with other people, even with strangers.

tanaka ryūnosuke had a shaved head with a widow's peak and sharp blue-grey eyes. loud, hot-headed, and easily angered, were the type of words which were somehow made to him. he was also someone with stronge mental fortitude. but, despite all this, he was caring and supportive of his teammates.

« - i may be little, but i can jump ! i’ll be karasuno’s ace !

\- hey ! hey ! the newbie says he’s gonna be the ace ? you’ve got some nerve. »

that comment made hinata shiver. he wasn’t expecting the second year to be this scary. noticing that, suga tried to lighten the mood and to rassure the first year.

« - it’s good to be ambitious, right ?

\- i- i’ll do my best ! »

hinata was back to smiling, and suga sighed in relief. it wasn’t really difficult for suga to be optimistic and to make people be too, but, with hinata, it seemed to be even more simple.

but, he couldn’t add anything because he was already cut by the other first year.

« - if you want to be the ace, i hope you've improved. if you goof around, you'll waste another three years. »

this comment made hinata angry. his face was showing it very well, but he couldn't help but to respond to kageyama's insult.

« - what did you say ?

\- why must you say that, kageyama ?, daichi said, trying to appease the growing tension.

\- i played with all my might. but... but don't tell me everything i've done is a waste !

\- guys... you know, you're not enemies anymore. volleyball is about teamwork-

\- i'll challenge you.

\- hey ! daichi-san is still talking !

\- challenge me to what ?

\- volleyball, what else ?

\- how do you expect to challenge me one-on-one ?

\- l-like passing contest !

-how do you compete at passing ? »

since hinata starting to challenge kageyama, and during all the argument, daichi was doing a face that could tell « i'll kill you if you two don't stop ».

hopefully, tanaka tried to stop everything, in his own way.

« - listen, damn it !

\- what's the commotion, volleyball club ? »

this time, it was the vice-principal who spoke. the boys were all quite suprised to see him here, so they all stopped to talk, except tanaka of course.

« - yikes. the dean !

\- sensei., suga murmured to tanaka, trying to correct him.

\- sensei., tanaka repeated, a fake smile on his face.

\- you'd better not be fighting.

\- of course not. just a friendly rivalry. right ?

\- this dean likes to make trouble, so keep it down., tanaka murmured to hinata, trying to calm him down because he still was clenching his fists.

\- serve ! i'll return them all.

\- hey !

\- i was only able to get one of your serves last year. i'm not the same person as last year.

\- not the same as last year, huh ? i'm not the same as last year, either. »

the tension already here was growing even faster than before, and everyone in the room could tell that a fight was really starting.

so, daichi, being the captain, tried to stop them, or, at least, to calm them down. especially since they were just in front of the vice-principal.

« - now, now, guys. let's not carried away.

\- is he a first year student ? »

but any of the two even noticed what daichi said and kageyama started his first serve, throwing it just in front of hinata's face, who could manage to avoid just before the ball touched him.

just after that, he did another one, and hinata could touche the ball and tried to receive, but the ball went on his face and, a second later on the vice-principal's, making his wig fly and go on daichi's face.

that was kageyama who started to speak again.

« - he was wearing a wig ?

\- you just noticed ? everyone at the entrance ceremony could tell.

\- you guys ! shut up !

\- tanaka, you shut up, too.

\- sawamura-kun, i'd like a word with you. »

and that's how it all started for them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> that’s it for the first chapter ! i know this is a bit short but i couldn’t find anything else to say here.
> 
> hope you enjoyed ! tell me in the comments what you think of that for the moment !
> 
> also tell me if i did any mistake !


	2. misunderstanding

one month after the beginning of the new school year, the team had really grown. new players, old ones who were still here... they were ten teammates now. 

the first years who joined the team after kageyama and hinata were named tsukishima kei and yamaguchi tadashi. they seemed to be really close friends.

tsukishima was very tall and had an incredibly slim build for a volleyball player. he was the tallest player, standing at 190.1 cm. he had short blond hair, pale skin, thin eyebrows and golden-brown eyes which were under glasses, and was often seen with a frown or a condescending smirk on his face. he was very blunt and would sometimes rile his teammates up due to his antagonistic nature and sometimes other teams because of his casual smug attitude.

yamaguchi, him, had dark grayish-green hair with a flyaway piece of hair sticking up at the top. he also had a lot of freckles on his face and was really skinny for his height. he was a pretty shy person who relies on others. though he was generally a nice person, he tended to snicker along or join in with tsukishima whenever he was mocking others.

as for the second years, apart of tanaka, they were three : ennoshita chikara, kinoshita hisashi and narita kazuhito. the three of them were always stuck together.

like tanaka, narita had a shaved head except his hair were much darker. he was tall and had a lean build. he had wide brown eyes and narrow eyebrows that matched his hair color. he was a calm, friendly person who didn't get riled up too easily.

kinoshita had short, spiky light brown hair and large narrowed eyes. he was also average in height. he was very anxious when it came to his own abilities and constantly worried about whether he was good or not.

ennoshita, him, had down-turned eyes, causing him to have a somewhat sleepy look on his face. he had medium-length dark brown hair kept parted near the middle. his eyebrows and eyes were the same brown color. he was usually quiet, reserved and could sometimes be seen with a gentle smile on his face, but he could also behave boldly towards the other second years. he had the ability to understand and relate to different people. despite this, ennoshita lacked confidence in himself. he was also really smart.

but, despite all of this, every second and third years - namely daichi, suga, tanaka, ennoshita, narita and kinoshita - knew that something was missing. that  _ someone _ was missing. they knew it too well. but they couldn't do anything about it.

that someone was actually two people : a second year, nishinoya yuu, and asahi. they had both left the club at the end of the last school year. asahi, because he felt like he wasn't enough, and noya, because he got into a fight. a fight against asahi.

it wasn't really surprising that noya fought. indeed, the shortest member of the team, with slanted brown eyes, wild black hair and a tiny tuft of dirty blonde hair that fell over his forehead, was a very energetic and temperamental person. he was extremely impatient, excitable and impulsive. his boisterous nature and crazy shenanigans could attract unwanted attention quite easily, which often went badly for him. but, although he hardly ever worried about the consequences of his actions, which could even revert to violence to vent out his anger, he was surprisingly considerate of his friends' feelings and insecurities.

but this time, he couldn't keep his calm. asahi had been breaking their mutual trust, saying that it was only his fault he couldn't manage to score. and noya was angry about it. because he knew that asahi had been able to score. he was just too hard on himself. for noya, listening asahi saying things like that was like an insult. it was like asahi didn't trust noya to receive the ball. they had a libero-ace relationship, and asahi was breaking it little-by-little. so noya became angry, he shouted at asahi, and, asahi, being scared, broke another thing. he broke a broom. and, somehow, the broom became the symbol of karasuno's defeat.

at this moment, suga couldn't say anything. he was, too, responsible for their lost, but he couldn't intervene. he wanted to though, but the words didn't want to come out of his mouth. and, since that day, suga felt responsible for losing not only the match, but also good players and teammates.

but, here they were, playing a match against the neighborhood association. daichi, hinata, kageyama, tanaka, ennoshita and tsukishima on one team, and suga, asahi and noya on the other team, with the adults. during the whole match, asahi didn't even care to ask for the ball, he only attacked a few times. it was like that until the last moment, when noya caught the ball after asahi was blocked.

« - even if the ball bounces off the wall... i'll keep it in play. so call for a toss again, ace ! »

this comment made asahi shiver. he was surprised to listen to noya saying such things, even after their fight.

meanwhile, the ball got to suga, who was still hesitating who to send it until the very last second, even when kageyama tried to reason him.

« - sugawara-san. give it to him 'til he scores ! »

suga didn't want to push asahi down, because he knew he didn't want the toss. so, shimada makoto, an adult who was on the same team as him, called for the toss. and suga was going to toss to him, like he asked.

« - SUGA ! one more ! »

hearing asahi yelling like that for the toss, made tanaka, noya, daichi and suga shiver. they were waiting for this for a while. for too long. but now, they knew everything was going back to normal. they knew noya and asahi would join again. they knew they were complete again. after all, together, they were a team.

—————

it was hot outside. especially here, near tokyo.

the karasuno volleyball team was joining a summer training camp with four other teams, which were nekoma, fukurodani, shinzen and ubuwaga. of course, they were the last ones to arrive, since the three others were located near where the training camp was happening.

barely arrived, tanaka and noya were already starting to do and say stupid things.

« - WOO ! is that...

\- could that be...

\- THE SKYTREE ?! »

they said in union. but of course, their hope were soon shattered by one of nekoma's third year students, who told them it was only a transmission tower. after that, all they could hear was kuroo's laugh, another third year.

kuroo tetsurō was tall and lean with broad shoulders, well-built arms, and a muscular frame. he had narrow, hazel colored eyes with cat-like pupils that made him appear sly and intimidating. his black hair were naturally messy and spiked upwards due to his bed head. he also had a fringe on his right side that partially covered his eye. he was considered a "provocation expert" by many. he would actively provoke others and was unrelenting when dishing out snide remarks. however, kuroo was kinder and genuine than what his exterior image conveyed.

after leaving their belongings in their dormitory, the team coming from miyagi warmed up and began, like the other teams present, to practice. of course, nothing was happening like they would like to. indeed, to begin with, hinata and kageyama still didn't talk to each other since their huge argument in the gym, which was a real problem considering that their fast attack didn't work anymore. secondly, everyone was practicing by their own or by little groups, making the matches more difficult in terms of coordination. then, some of them just didn't want to practice: it was tsukishima's case. for him, volleyball was just a club. he didn't need to practice again and again, repeating the same movements every time for hours. but, of course, he didn't have the choice: he was already dragging by kuroo to practice with him and two fukuronadi students, akaashi and bokuto.

bokuto kōtarō was the volleyball team's ace and captain. he had round, golden-colored eyes and spiky white-grey hair with black streaks, making him look like a owl, and a solid and muscular build. he had a playful, friendly, bombastic, and child-like personality and was described by his team as having "mood swings", where even the slightest thing could change his mood. bokuto was energetic, often making jokes about everything and acting rather dramatically about his plays, wanting attention or affirmation from his teammates.

akaashi keiji, on the contrary, was a second year and was the volleyball team's vice-captain and setter. he had messy black hair and gunmetal blue eyes with thin pupils and slightly thick eyebrows. he often wore an emotionless or slightly exasperated expression a great majority of the time but could smile occasionally given the circumstance. he was calm and composed most of the time, usually choosing not to show a wide range of emotions. akaashi could also suffer from overthinking, and feeling overwhelmed from the pressue he had placed on himself. he had a habit of calling people out on the foolish things they did, especially bokuto, who he seemed to be relatively close with despite their opposing personalities.

and since that evening, it became a ritual. every night, they would come on the third gym and practice together. soon, they were join by hinata and haiba lev, a tall first year from nekoma. but, the day, it was like they didn't do this. they didn't talk to each other, except for tsukishima and kuroo, the latter seeming to enjoy annoying the youngest.

usually, kuroo and bokuto were hanging out together, sometimes with tsukishima too. hinata was mostly with lev and the second year setter from nekoma, kozume kenma. akaashi, him, was most of the time with suga and nekoma's libero, yaku.

yaku morisuke had brown eyes and short brown hair. standing at 166 cm, he is really insecure about his height. off the court, he was supportive of his team and often took on a parental role when speaking toward, or of them, similar to sugawara. because of this, suga and him got along well. he could also be incredibly short-tempered, especially concerning lev, who seemed to find his angry outbursts "scary". overall, however, yaku was a rather honest, straightforward person who was very confident about his skills and looked out for his team.

all the teams were mixed, and everyone could get to know the others at least a little more. it was like they were an only giant team. like a huge family.

—————

the summer training camp had begin 5 days ago. all the teams knew they would soon leave, so they decided to enjoy the most the last few days they had together. they practiced even more, they hang out more too... everyone was enjoying their last moments. well, everyone except two.

daichi and asahi seemed off. it was like something was missing,  _ someone  _ was missing. and, this someone was suga. indeed, the latter almost didn't talk to them since the beginning of the week. he was always with akaashi and yaku, and daichi and asahi felt  _ rejected, forgotten, neglected, replaced_ _._ but they didn't say anything. they were waiting for suga to notice, he who always put the good of others before his own.

but this time, it was like suga was blind. he didn't notice anything. or that was what the third years thought. maybe he was just avoiding them. maybe he just didn't want to talk to them anymore. maybe they were a burden to him. maybe he found something better. maybe he found someone better. yeah,  _maybe_.

after days of doubt, they couldn't take it anymore. so, one night, after practice, they decided to go to see suga. for them, it was the best option. after all, what could happen ?

—————

they were in the gym. the room was empty, except for the three boys. it was silent, no one seemed to want to talk, or to just start the conversation. however, suga, who was standing in front of the two others, broke the silence.

« - so... what did you guys want ? »

nothing. silence again. nothing to hear. no eyes to meet with. they were avoiding his question. they were avoiding him.

however, asahi was the first one to talk, much to everyone's surprise.

« - suga... you know, we were wondering...

\- wondering what ?, suga asked, getting impatient.

\- ... are you avoiding us ? »

suga was surprised by asahi question. he really didn't expect that. he didn't even understand what that meant.

_ what is he saying ?! do i look like someone who could avoid my best friends without a reason ?! does he think i am someone bad ?! this... _

anger was growing inside of suga. he was trying to stay calm, because he always had been, but it was stronger than him. he couldn't manage to hold back at this very moment. why did his friends, his best friends, were thinking that about him ? he did everything for them, he was always there for them, and, for the first time in a long while, now that he was having fun with other people instead of always worrying for them, he was being accused of letting them down ?! it was too much.

« - WHAT ARE YOU IMPLYING ?! THAT I AM NOT A GOOD FRIEND ?! THAT I AM NOT GOOD ENOUGH ?! LET ME BREATHE FOR ONCE GODDAMMIT !

\- wait suga... that was not what i meant...

\- SO WHY ARE YOU SAYING THAT ? LET ME LIVE MY LIFE FOR ONCE !

\- suga you're scaring me... stop it please.

\- NO ! YOU. HAVE. TO. UNDERSTAND. THAT.  _I_. CAN. LIVE. WITHOUT. BEING. NEAR.  _YOU_.  EVERYTIME. »

for every world, suga had paused and was pointing at asahi. he knew he was maybe, just  maybe, a little overreacting, but at this moment, he didn't care. 

« - suga listen to me. asahi didn't want to imply all of that. we were just wondering, that's all. but if you were not, we're sorry to have imagined things which weren't true.

\- I DON'T GIVE A FUCK DAICHI ! YOU KNOW WHAT ? GO FUCK YOURSELVES ! BOTH OF YOU !

\- OK STOP NOW ! YOU ARE GOING TOO FAR ! AND FOR WHAT ? NOTHING ! WE ALREADY APOLOGIZED ! I DIDN'T MEAN TO TURN MY SENTENCE LIKE THAT AND YOU KNOW IT ! SO STOP YELLING AND INSULTING US ! »

_ clap. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i think that’s it for the chapter 2 ! i know nothing is clear and the writing is not really good, but i couldn’t find my words for the ideas i had. anyway, i hope you’ll enjoy !


	3. grudge

silence.

again, this awful silence. but not the type of silence where you could be uncomfortable. no. this time, the pressure you could feel in the silence was overwhelming. everyone in the gym could agree with it.

_what did i do ? did i just slap him ? why ? why am i like this ? why can't i control myself ? why do i -_

« - go. go away. please. sugawara. just go. »

these words. it wasn't even a proper sentence. but these words, especially the _sugawara_ , broke his heart.

daichi was mad at him, he could feel it through the words he just said to him. asahi was watching him with fear and anger. he disappointed them. he lost his best friends. and why ? because he _fucking couldn't control himself._

so suga went away. he just ran, without turning back once, even though he really wanted to, because he knew they would never stop him. they would never tell him to come back. they would never apologize. and they souldn't. it was his fault, _only his._

he was so mad at himself right now. so much mad, so fucking much. he was so lost in his thoughts that he didn't even notice he had left the camp, or that someone was approaching him.

_what do i do now ? what if they don't want to talk to me anymore ? that's plausible. but what if they don't accept my apologies ? and why would i apologize ? i know i am in wrong this time but they know better than anyone else that it's difficult for me ! argh i don't know what to do ! i think i'll just wait for their anger to pass and i'll see what i'll do then._

« - suga ?... can we... you know... talk ? »

the voice made him jump in fear. mostly because of the owner of the voice.

« - yeah, if you want to.

\- okey so... where to start ? i'm sorry. for insinuating things that weren't true. i'm also sorry for yelling at you. oh and also for telling you to leave. i shouldn't have.

\- wh- what ? why are you apologizing ? you did nothing wrong you know... it should be me apologizing, not the other way around.

\- but i know it's difficult for you, so i just did it instead.

\- thanks daichi, it means a lot. also i'm sorry too. »

again, a silence took place between them. but they were comfortable with this one. they knew the other was thinking of something, and they did not want to interrupt whatever they were thinking about.

suga didn't know what daichi was thinking about. not at all, daichi was just so difficult to read. but he knew he - suga - wasn't. he knew daichi could read him, just by looking at his eyes. so he just turned away, and started to think of memories which just decided to come back.

_—————_

_sometime during their first year_

they knew each other for less than one year. but they spent most of their time together, mostly thanks to - or because of, they couldn't decide - volleyball practice. by the time they started to hang out together, they got to know each other better. like the habits everyone had, like what type of person they were and what type they inspired to become, like what they liked to eat, like what were their favourite subjects and what were their worst, things like that.

they had had so many types of conversation suga couldn't remember half of them. but this time, one in particular appeared on his mind.

« so guys, what do you all want to do later ? »

it was daichi who started the conversation. ut was usually him anyway. it was an habit for them now : daichi asked a question, asahi started to panic and answer stammering, and suga answered after making fun of asahi.

« - hum... i don't really know... i think i will just go to college and i'll about what i really want to do later...

\- oh yeah, that's good. if you don't really know, i think that's the best option. and you suga ?

\- oh hum... i think i want to help people ! i don't really know how for the moment, but i know i want to. if i can help someone with whatever type of things, i'll do it !

\- you know suga... »

suga and daichi were suprised to hear asahi. they both turned to face him, making him understand he could continue.

« - i was thinking... don't get me wrong ! i really like that part of you but, maybe you're too helpful... like, maybe you should sometimes think about yourself before others, even if that's really cool to know that you're always here for us if we need to. but like, be a little more selfish ? »

_—————_

_present_

he remembered he never replied to asahi that day. maybe he should have.

_you know asahi, i know what you said had a good intention, but i prefer making people happy instead of letting them being sad or worried, 'cause if they're happy, so i am._

yeah, maybe he should have. i knew that, now that asahi and him argued over something about his selfishness, asahi would blame himself, and even more if he remembered about this conversation.

the thought of that made suga sad. more than he should have been. more than he wanted to be. more than he needed to be. it made him so, so, so sad. but he tried to hide it the more he could. he tried, really. like he tried not to let fall the tear that formed in the corner of his eye. or to let fall the second, the third, and all the others.

it was just guilt. pure guilt. _what else could it be ?_

but he was too rancorous. he would never apologise. never. even more in front of asahi. it was like breaking his pride.

daichi had surely noticed his friend's sadness, because he put his hand on hus shoulder, and gave him a shy smile, certainly, but comfoting enough to stop suga from crying. the latter replied with a weak smile, but it was enough for daichi. he knew suga would't want to talk about it, and he could also guess what was the reason even without suga.

with that, daichi tried to start a new conversation. but he knew everything about suga already, or at least knew the big lines. it was not like suga was the kind to hide something from him. they were quite close, and they shared a lot of things together.

« - hey suga ?

\- yeah ?

\- tell me again, why do you want to be a teacher ?

\- oh ! hm... it's 'cause i really like children ! and i just want to help ! i like it when you are here for someone and they know it, they're so happy it makes me be too ! and, _oh_ when you teach something interesting to someone, and their eyes shine brightly, i just want to see it all day ! i think that's the main reasons why i want to be a teacher. and you ? why a policeman ?

\- mostly 'cause i want to protect people. and also wsnt to help them. it makes me feel really happy to see people happy and safe. and i want the loy to be respected, also. for the good of everybody.

\- that's so cool ! i hope we'll be able to see each other later when we'll be who we want to be !

\- of course we will, don't worry about it.

\- yeah, why wouldn- OH LOOK ! the stars are beautiful don't you think ? »

amazement was graved on suga's face. he was like a 5-year-old kid opening his christmas presents in the morning. he was so childish, and yet so mature, it made daichi scared.

_how can someone be so cute and beautiful and at the same time so serious and mature ? he really is a mystery. it's almost scary though._

but daichi couldn't help but stare at the boy next to him. he was so mesmerizing, so enthralling, so fascinating, so himself. he was like an angel, or a demon, daichi couldn't decide. but, he was certain about one thing, whoever suga was, he surely was a beautiful one.

—————

they didn't know what time it was. and they didn't even care. they were just lost watching something, suga had his eyes on the stars, and daichi had his eyes on one star in particular. but this star was, surprisingly, not in the sky. he was so mesmerized by his friend, he was so proud to have him in his life. what could he do without him ? he himself didn't know the answer, and maybe nobody knew it as well.

after hours of watching stars, they decided to go back to the camp. they had to sleep, because, even if tomorrow was the last day, they needed rest. they finally arrived at their dormitories, and tried not to wake up everyone. at the moment they were near their sheets, they started to change into their pajamas.

it was cold outside, and it seemed like it was colder inside, even though they were under their blanket. they tried to sleep, but in vain. they really tried, again and again, for more than an hour. but it was impossible. they were constantly turning over in their beds, well if we could call that beds. since suga had an idea, he decided to share it with daichi, in a hesitating voice.

« - daichi ?

\- hum ?

\- do you... you know... »

he took a moment to breathe, and to formulate his question in his head.

« - do you mind if i stay next to you ? it's kinda cold and i can't sleep. »

daichi was a little surprise by suga's question. he clearly didn't expect that, even if he didn't really expect anything at the beginning. so, since he was cold too, he nodded and accepted.

« - yeah, of course. come on, then. i'll warm you up, you seemed really cold. we shouldn't have been outside for so long, i knew it was a bad idea in the first place.

\- thank you daichi, really.

\- for what ? »

but suga never responded. he was already asleep, smiling and relaxed in his friend's arms. it was like paradise for him, clearly. this view made daichi suprisingly happy. he smiled a little, and went to sleep, like suga.

and with suga's smile in mind, he fell asleep too, a smile also fixed on his face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> that’s it for the chapter 3 !
> 
> so yeah -  
> like the first chapter, it’s kind of short, but i just wanted to write fluff and what is planned next just couldn’t go with this chapter.
> 
> anyway, i hope you enjoyed !  
> (and if you see a mistake, please don’t forget to tell me, it’d be really helpful !)
> 
> i love you all, take care and have good day/night. <3  
> (btw if it’s past 1am at yours, go to sleep please, you need rest, it’s not healthy to stay awake this late.)


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